The Tangled Web of Infinity

IT HAS BEGUN (or Presidential Nominees '08! 1-07 Edition)

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Sat, 27 Jan 2007 04:15:11 GMT

Well, since everyone else is doing it, I might as well jump on the bandwagon. Even though it's only January 2007, and elections aren't until November 2008, everyone is so fucking sick of Bush's bullshit that they want to ignore him and focus on the future. So here it is, my countdown (so far) of a little game I like to call:

"Who Wants To Be President 2008?!?"

Senator Barack Obama, Democrat, Illinois-
Okay, I know I'm biased because he's from my state of origin, but I like Obama. I really like him. I'd buy the man ice cream without him asking. I've liked him since I first heard about him when he was running for Senator of Illinois. He says all the right things, pisses off all the right people, and looks damn good doing it. He's one of, if not the best speaker on the list of democrat nominees, and there's a sense of opportunity and optimism to his campaign that hasn't been seen in a president since Kennedy. The downside? He hasn't finished his first Senate term yet. He's young, inexperienced, and he's opposed to just about everything that the average Republican is for. Now that's good for me, but it's bad for him in red states. And he's going to have to deal with the more experienced contenders with their loyal guards of successful fundraisers if he's going to win the Democrat bid.

Senator John Edwards, Democrat, North Carolina-
I'm the first to admit that the Democrat candidates didn't overly thrill me initially for President and VP in 2004. But by about September, after they'd kicked their campaign up a notch and were starting to hit at Bush and Co real hard, they started to really gain my support, rather then simply being the lesser of two evils. I could see Edwards as President. I think he'd do a good job. Mind you, I'm still all gung-ho about Edwards from his debate with Cheney in 2004. Edwards is (so far) keeping out of the Obama/Clinton spectacle, which is probably the smartest thing for him to do right now.

Senator Hillary Clinton, Democrat, New York-
I know she's the number one choice on everyone else's list, but I'd really much rather have Obama or Edwards on the ticket than her. Do we really need a return to the Clinton White House? I know political dynasties are hard to avoid, but for 20 years of politics to be divided into the Bush family on the right and the Clintons on the left, it just seems kind of outlandish. And while Hillary has all the connections and is deeply rooted in the party, frankly she comes off as much more harsh and cold than either of the other two top three. I know she can do the job, I just would prefer someone else.

Senator Chuck Hagel, Republican, Nebraska-
Oh, if a Republican must become President in '08, let it be Chuck Hagel. Hagel has been against the Iraq war for a quite a long time. He's considering running as an Independent. He's getting lots of press because he is A.) a Republican and B.) opposed to the war. He doesn't stand a chance, of course, but there you have it.

Senator John McCain, Republican, Arizona-
In 2004 if you had asked me would I support a John McCain presidency over a Democrat who I consider weak or unqualified, the answer would have quickly been yes. McCain was a moderate, he was pro-prisoner rights, vehemently opposed to Guantanamo Bay, and he wasn't afraid to piss off the Christian Right. He was a good moderate, and by all accounts one of the few voices of reason that the GOP had left during the heyday of Bush's first term. Oh, how the world has changed. First off, I think the odds of the Democrats putting forth a candidate I consider "weak" next year are pretty much slim to none. Second of all, the John McCain of 2007 is not the John McCain of 2004. In his efforts to woo the public's support, McCain has gone from being a vocal critic of the Bush administration to being one of its biggest supporters in Iraq. By becoming more conservative, McCain is hoping to take back the voters he lost to Bush in 2000. He's also lost some of respect, I'm afraid.

Ex-Mayor Rudy Giuliani, Republican, New York City-
There are things about Rudy Giuliani that I like, and things I really don't like. But the really important question for him, I think, is just how qualified is he? I realize that New York is the biggest city in the country, but it's still just a city. He has virtually no experience in Washington, or even as a governor. I personally think he needs to pursue one of those two choices before he tries to bite off more than he can chew.

Senator Sam Brownback, Republican, Kansas-
I don't care for Brownback, and never have. I find his views on things like "family values" and reproductive rights to be positively medieval. And he's very loud about what he thinks. But he's setting himself in opposition to McCain on Iraq, and just as McCain has tried to get closer to Christian Conservatives, Brownback is trying to come off as more moderate. The thing is, I don't fall for it for a second. Brownback’s official Presidential Entry speech brought up his belief that America needed to become more religious and less secular, and I know all about Brownback's breed of religion.

There are a whole bunch of other candidates, on both sides, but I honestly don't know enough about most of them to comment yet. Of the Democrats I haven't mentioned, Joe Biden (Delaware Senator) probably is the name most frequently heard, with Christopher Dodd (Connecticut Senator) and Tom Vilsack (ex-Governor of Iowa) after that. On the Republican side, Mitt Romney (ex-Massachusetts Governor) is getting some press, but I haven't looked into him at all yet. With any luck, Newt Gingrich (ex-House Speaker and World Class Jerkwad) will just keep his mouth shot. If there's one person I disdain more than Dick Cheney and George Bush…

How Perverted Is This Justice?

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Sun, 21 Jan 2007 20:16:06 GMT

When you work in television, nothing is more important than ratings. Not artistic integrity, nor common sense and reasonability, and certainly not journalistic credibility. Here’s looking at you, Bill O’Reilly (actually, I try not to look at him, as his visage is so dark and tormented that it’s been known to make my eyes bleed). But no, I’m not going to make this into another bitch-fest about Fox News, because frankly, I’m rather of the opinion that if Fox News is your main source of media, you really have no one to blame but yourself. No, I’m talking about NBC his time.

Specifically, I have a problem with a segment Dateline has been running for the last several years. If you haven’t seen it you’ve certainly heard of it. It’s called “To Catch A Predator”, and it’s gotten a ton of media coverage ever since it began. See, what happens is this: A task force called “Perverted Justice” has people go into chat rooms, pretending to be preteen girls. These decoy teens engage in explicit conversations with adults, eventually convincing them to meet with the “teen”. The trap is set, and when the would-be child molesters are lured into a specially set up house, they encounter Dateline correspondent Chris Hansen (A poor man’s Stone Phillips) who chastises them for being bad people. And then as they try to leave with there tail between their legs, they’re arrested.

Hmm.

Well, it all sounds good on the surface, I suppose. I mean, I love a good NAMBLA joke as much as anyone. And the show gets wild ratings (that’s why they’ve done, like, 28 different segments of it), and that’s not really a surprise. People love to see something creepy on television, it thrills them. And nothing is more sick and disgusting than a child molester (for good reasons). So, you have your heroes, the Perverted Justice team and Chris Hansen, tricking the disgusting perverts into outing themselves on national television for millions to see right before the police nab them. Sounds like a brilliant plan, because sure, lives are totally ruined, but they’re the bad guys lives, not real people. And better yet, you add another level of fear to all this, because most of the people they catch are fairly average looking, “normal” people. Even your neighbor could be one of them. And fear sells real good. Yes it does.

However, more and more “To Catch A Predator” is receiving criticism. The main reason for this has to do with altruism. It’s been argued that Dateline keeps doing this segment, not out of a sense of civic duty, but because every time they do they get a ratings spike. And I do agree, that’s exactly why NBC has these segments, because they’re profitable. But just because money is the reason they show these things, that doesn’t negate the “good” that these segments do. I’m not convinced that profiting by doing something positive for the community necessarily negates the positive-ness of doing that same community service.

What does trouble me, though, is the total acceptance at face value that what “To Catch A Predator” does is, in fact, good. In my mind, the whole concept of what happens here brings up a host of entrapment and due process issues, and that makes me feel a bit icky. And not “child molester” icky, I mean “Bill of Rights” icky. Here’s a perfect example of why: Friday night I caught a repeat of an episode that took place in Petaluma, California. Here’s an interview between the detective in charge of the sting, and one of those bastard child-molesting crazies. The catch? This guy is a prominent San Francisco doctor. We begin right after he has stupidly waved his Miranda Rights to an attorney.

Det. Nelson: Why did you come to the house in Petaluma today?
Wolin: I was curious.
Det. Nelson: Okay. Curious about what?
Wolin: I chatted with someone online. She asked to meet me on several occasions. I declined. And today again she asked. I had a little bit of time, not very much.
Det. Nelson: Okay.
Wolin: And so I thought I would come out and meet her and nothing more.
Det. Nelson: Okay. How old was the person you were chatting with?
Wolin: I’m not sure. I know she was young and I know that—
Det. Nelson: Under 18?
Wolin: I’m not sure.
Det. Nelson: Did you talk to her about “touching and kissing and making each other feel good”?
Wolin: I remember she’s saying that she had trouble finding somebody to make her feel good.
Det. Nelson: Okay.
Wolin: I was playing with her.
Det. Nelson: And then you typed to her “I wouldn’t stop until you came over and over.”
Wolin: Remember saying that.
Det. Nelson: Then you talked to her about kissing her chest?
Wolin: I don’t remember.
Det. Nelson: And then you told her, “No I’m real but you’re under 18 and I’m over. We would have to be so careful.”
Wolin: I don’t remember saying that. But I told her that she needed to be—I was concerned about her. She needed to be careful.
Det. Nelson: So you commented about her body lookin’ pretty—
Wolin: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Det. Nelson: Okay.
Wolin: I don’t remember.
Det. Nelson: And then you asked her what bra size she wore? And she said, “30 B but it kinda big on me right now. I’m still growin’.”
Wolin: I don’t remember her saying that.
Det. Nelson: Okay. And saying that you will kiss them?
Wolin: I don’t remember. The only reason I came today I was curious that I wasn’t going to do anything. And if you read that you can tell that over and over again I said that both I shouldn’t come. She should be careful.
Det. Nelson: But I’m also reading, I mean correct me if I’m wrong, you’re talking about you want her to take your pants off.
Wolin: When?
Det. Nelson: You talk about you know, “What will you wear?” “I don’t know what—whatever—whatever’s clean. Something sexy.” Then you said, “Will you take it off for me?” And then you ask her then, “Do you want her to take your pants off also?”
Wolin: It was just wa—
Det. Nelson: And, “You can—you can take mine off if you want.”
Wolin: I wasn’t so—
Det. Nelson: How do you wanna do it?
Wolin: I wasn’t going to do anything. It was not appropriate. Officer Nelson, I shouldn’t have talked to her. You’re right. I wasn’t—
Det. Nelson: Okay.
Wolin: --going to do anything with her.
Det. Nelson: So you drove 40 minutes from Piedmont to meet a 13-year-old—
Wolin: I didn’t know she was 13.
Nelson: --that nothing would’ve happened.
Wolin: That’s right.
Det. Nelson: And you expect me to believe that?
Wolin: It’s true.
Det. Nelson: After you talk about having—
Wolin: It’s the truth.
Det. Nelson: --different sexual—
Wolin: It’s the truth.
Det. Nelson: --acts with her?
Dr. Wolin: It’s the truth. She begged me to come. And I know that doesn’t make it right but I never would’ve done anything.
Det. Nelson: Okay. All right. The time’s approximately 14:38 and I conclude the interview.

Now, while Dr. Wolin did something incredibly stupid, yes, did he do anything that was legally wrong? While solicitation to a minor is a federal offense, neither the Detective nor Hansen earlier in the show debate with the Doctor about whether he did or did not know the “girl” was 13. He might have, but there’s nothing in the transcripts that are given that prove it. There is one instance in these transcripts of the doctor saying she’s under 18, but nothing is embellished upon.

More to the point, though, is the claim that the girl “begged” him repeatedly to come to the house. You’ll notice the detective doesn’t debate this either. If this is true, this is clearly entrapment. I’ll begrudgingly let it slide that Dateline admits that usually the sting operators themselves are the first to bring up an in-person meeting, but if they repeatedly attempted to get this Doctor to enter their trap and it was after several refusals that he finally caved in, that’s entrapment, plain and simple. It seems likely to me that Dr. Wolin has long held closeted pedophilic urges and fantasies, and after many years of wondering he saw an opportunity with someone who really wanted to experiment. I’m not saying it’s morally right, and certainly if he had ended up acting on these feelings it would have been illegal. But talking to a 13 year old on the internet about sex is not illegal (usually). And meeting someone you meet online is not illegal. And proving someone intended to meet a minor for the purpose of sexual intercourse is difficult, to say the least.

I don’t condone what these people who are arrested did, but I do think a television broadcast like this brings up some serious questions. The thing that Dateline likes to tiptoe around is that Perverted Justice is a vigilante-activist organization. They are not recognized officers of the law, nor do they have government backing. I mean, when your whole mission statement is to help protect children and the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children has criticized your methods and said they won’t support you, you’d think that would say something to them. And I’m sorry, but isn’t it possible that this is causing more problems than it solves? Sure, really stupid would-be child molesters are arrested (and I’m going to keep mostly quiet about the logical problems with “molesting” someone who asks you to come have sex with them, because consent laws are a different matter entirely). But who’s to say that Perverted Justice is really doing anything more than thinning out the herd? Sure, the ones dumb enough to fall for this are caught, but what about the smart ones with lots of experience at this? Well, it teaches them to be smarter, doesn’t it? Everyone in the US knows about this program, and honestly, who has the most to learn from this? Not the parents, no, but the would-be child abductors. Because they see what’s happening, and that teaches them to be more careful.

But they allegedly stop child molesters. So, you see, legal process and common sense rarely affect people’s judgment. People see this report on heroic citizen volunteers stopping the bad, horrible pedophiles, and that’s all they see. Most people can’t look at the big picture, and this shortsightedness is, in my opinion, the heart of what wrong about Perverted Justice and “To Catch A Predator”. We can not just abandon entrapment laws because the particular crime is so horrible, and we can’t ignore rationality because a particular group of vigilantes goes after a particularly seedy group of bad guys. Enforcing the law is supposed to be the job of officers of the law. The system isn’t perfect, but ignoring the rules of the system isn’t the answer either. And I’m sorry, but Perverted Justice can claim they’d sent 127 perverts to prison all they want. The people they’re arrested may very well have done something dreadfully wrong. That doesn’t make what Perverted Justice does right.

Less Than Happy News…

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Fri, 15 Dec 2006 18:00:12 GMT

Well, it’s official. The most endangered species of marine animal in the world, the Chinese River Dolphin, is extinct.

A species found only in the Yangtze River, the dolphin has long been critically endangered. Despite the adamant statements by the Chinese government that they would do everything they could to protect them, apparently the construction of the Three Gorges Dam (the largest dam in the world, some 5 times the size of the Hoover Dam, and the less-than-successful answer to Shanghai’s ever increasing power problems) was considered more important. This seems to be the final straw for the nearly blind dolphin, who’s population ten years ago was estimated at only 50 animals. There are no living specimens in captivity. The world is a lesser place for this loss.

Much Later: I Shall Become A Bat!

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Thu, 07 Dec 2006 21:15:14 GMT

I'm having a not-happy week. So maybe this will cheer me up:

Finally!!!

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Thu, 09 Nov 2006 17:35:24 GMT

Well it's about god damn time.

Huzzah And Such!!!

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Wed, 08 Nov 2006 16:31:29 GMT

Today is going to be a good day. The bad guys have lost the house, and may yet loose the senate. Not only did we take the house, the democrats have a 234-201 lead on the house seats. That’s quite a lead, considering before we were at 232-202-1 for the republicans. Not only that, but the democrats have taken majority over the state governorships, for the first time in 12 years (and even though our own governor is a total twit, at least he’s a twit who reports to my team).

What does this mean? Well, time will tell, really, but considering Shruby’s polls have been lingering under 40% for the better part of a year and that his entire agenda was based around forcing congress to his will, well, things have looked better for him.

Heh. Jackass.

UPDATE (12:15 PM, 11/8/06)

What’s that? Rumsfeld? Leaving? Gasp! What sad, sad news. No wait. That other thing. It goes something like “Holy shit! Yes! Yes! Yes!”

And Montana goes to the Dems as well. The only thing left is Virginia. If the state votes in Jim Webb- deposing racist, anti-semitic and gay-bashing prick George Allen- The Senate will be split 49-49-2, with both independents being more than just a little liberal leaning. Come on, Virginia. I know he waves that Confederate Flag of slavery and oppression that you guys love so much, but can’t you see past that and realize that he’s a douche bag? I know you can….

Public Service Announcement Time

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Fri, 13 Oct 2006 20:27:24 GMT

Happy 699th Anniversary of the Original Friday the Thirteenth Everyone!!!

It’s the not-quite-700th Anniversary, so it seems a good idea to celebrate. However, I have a million things to do, what with *ahem* editing Pantheon and being swapped at work and all. So, if you want to know more about this momentous day and just why the hell it scares our culture so much, I suggest you look here and here. And a Happy 699th Anniversary of the Fall of the Knights Templar to you all!

Fetch… The Comfy Chair!!! Jarring Chord

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Tue, 10 Oct 2006 19:59:50 GMT

Wheeeeee!!!!

Sorry, I’m still feeling pretty good over the fact that Friday I finished Book One of Pantheon!!!!!!!
Okay, that’s not strictly true, as in fact I only finished a draft of the script of Pantheon. But still! Despite a few script contradictions and character modification, the first book’s script is actually completed. I’ve got some editing to do, but how many other 20 year olds have written a novel dealing with philosophy, religion, and culture painted as a backdrop to an action/adventure epic filled with political intrigue and wonder? The answer: Not very many. So that means in a few short weeks I’m going to have a few people read the script for me, edit the beejeezus out of it, and tell me what rocks and what sucks. It’ll be fun! So, ah, hmm… volunteers?

I’m lacking much else to say, other than I have a number of devilish schemes in place which I shan’t speak of publicly, but get me in a good mood and I might discuss them privately. So, rather than ramble on with random nonsense you don’t really care about,
I thought I’d substitute it with someone else’s random nonsense!

(Chapman enters living room, where Cleveland is sitting.)

Chapman: Trouble at mill.

Cleveland: Oh no - what kind of trouble?

Chapman: One on't cross beams gone owt askew on treadle.

Cleveland: Pardon?

Chapman: One on't cross beams gone owt askew on treadle.

Cleveland: I don't understand what you're saying.

Chapman: (slightly irritatedly and with exaggeratedly clear accent) One of the cross beams has gone out askew on the treadle.

Cleveland: Well what on earth does that mean?

Chapman: *I* don't know - Mr Wentworth just told me to come in here and say that there was trouble at the mill, that's all - I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition.

(Jarring Chord. The door flies open and Cardinal Ximinez of Spain enters, flanked by two junior cardinals. Cardinal Biggles has goggles pushed over his forehead. Cardinal Fang is just Cardinal Fang.)

Ximinez: NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise...surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope.... Our *four*...no... *Amongst* our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear, surprise.... I'll come in again.

(The Inquisition exits)

Chapman: (Deadpan.)I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition.

(Jarring Chord. The cardinals burst in)

Ximinez: NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as: fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and nice red uniforms - Oh damn! (To Cardinal Biggles) I can't say it - you'll have to say it.

And Now for a Brief Public Service Announcement

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Wed, 04 Oct 2006 20:51:26 GMT

Just so you know, both Nip/Tuck and the season premiere of Veronica Mars rocked so very hard last night. That is all.

And The World Just Got A Hell Of A Lot Scarier…

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Mon, 02 Oct 2006 20:33:49 GMT

In 1859, a Swiss businessman named Jean Henri Dunant witnessed the aftermath of the Battle of Solferino in the Austro-Sardinian War. After seeing the suffering of tens of thousands of wounded soldiers, Dunant went on to form the Red Cross and conceive the original Geneva Conventions. Dunant would go on to be awarded the first ever Nobel Peace Prize for his efforts. Originally conceived as a way to protect injured and captive soldiers in wartime, the Geneva Conventions were greatly expanded upon, especially after World War 2, and have become the backbone of modern international law.

Leave it to George W. Bush to fuck everything up.

Ever since the official outing of the ‘secret’ CIA prisons in Cuba and other parts of the world, Bush & Co. have done everything in their power to convince the American public that torturing prisoners held without trial or access to legal assistance is some how a good thing. And apparently the majority of the House and Senate agree with the bastards. Last week the Senate, after some very minor changes, approved the bill.

So that you can see what I’m talking about, here’s the important part of bill in question. Gaze upon thy works and despair, oh citizens of these United States:

AGREEMENT UPON COMMON ARTICLE 3

SEC. 7. TREATY OBLIGATIONS NOT ESTABLISHING GROUNDS FOR CERTAIN CLAIMS.
(a) IN GENERAL. No person may invoke the Geneva Conventions or any protocols thereto in any habeas or civil action or proceeding to which the United States, or a current or former officer, employee, member of the Armed Forces, or other agent of the United States, is a party as a source of rights, in any court of the United States or its States or territories.
…

SEC. 8. IMPLEMENTATION OF TREATY OBLIGATIONS.
(a)(1) IN GENERAL. The acts enumerated in subsection 2441(d) of title 18, United States Code, as amended by subsection (b) of this section, and in subsection (c) of this section, constitute violations of Common Article 3 of the Geneva Conventions prohibited by United States law.
(2) PROHIBITION ON GRAVE BREACHES. The provisions in section 2441 of title 18, United States Code, as amended by this section, fully satisfy the obligation under Article 129 of the Third Geneva Convention for the United States to provide effective penal sanctions for grave breaches which are encompassed in Common Article 3 in the context of an armed conflict not of an international character. No foreign or international sources of law shall supply a basis for a rule of decision in the courts of the United States in interpreting the prohibitions enumerated in subsection 2441(d).
(3)INTERPRETATION BY THE PRESIDENT. (A) As provided by the
Constitution and by this section, the President has the authority for the United States to interpret the meaning and application of the Geneva Conventions and to promulgate higher standards and administrative regulations for violations of treaty obligations which are not grave breaches of the Geneva Conventions.
(B) The President shall issue such interpretations by Executive
Order published in the Federal Register, and such orders shall be
authoritative (as to non-grave breach provisions) as a matter of United States law, in the same manner as other administrative regulations.
(C) Nothing in this section shall affect the constitutional
functions and responsibilities of Congress and the judicial branch of the United States.
…

Pretty scary shit. The President of the United States now gets to interpret the Geneva Conventions (because “outrages upon human dignity” is too “vague and undefined” for the president, apparently). This would be the same man behind the wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, and quite possibly Iran if things don’t start changing real soon; behind “Mission Accomplished” in Iraq three years ago; behind the general government incompetence during the numerous hurricane disasters last fall; and- just for good measure- let’s not forget being behind numerous attempts to declare homosexual marriage illegal, proving he is just a world class jerk. Yes, clearly this is the man most qualified to determine what the Geneva Convention writers really meant when they said “outrages upon human dignity”. Of course.

The real tragedy, (other than the hundreds of people who will now “legally” be brutalized because of this insanity, of course) is that Congress let him do this. Oh that’s right, I went there. See, Bush and company are historically a group of sociopathic fucktards who are obsessed with gaining more and more power for themselves. And after six bloody years (Ha! Syntax! Take the meaning of that as you will!) of the Bush machine ruining virtually everything they touch like some sort of weird anti-Midas, CONGRESS SHOULD KNOW BETTER! Essentially, they just handed the reigns of international law over to a moron who, quite frankly, cares nothing at all for international law (or international relations, for that matter). Why the hell did anyone think this was a good idea?

Well, the answer to that is that there’s this really irritating trump card Bush likes to flash anytime he feels a bit of pressure, called “American Security”. For some reason, all the dick has to do is say something is for “American Security”, and he gets anything he wants. Anything. No matter how horrible. And no matter how many more laws that are made and liberties that are crushed by the Bush machine, actual national security doesn’t really seem to change. The only thing that really changes is how many metaphorical cameras are watching us at any given time. And considering how frequently this country seems to come under direct assault from “terrorists”, for some reason the current administration seems a lot more scary to me than the people we’re supposed to be afraid of.

Ever wonder what it looks like when the bad guys are winning? I’m thinking it’s pretty much like this.

Sugar and Spice and is the Thai Government Nice?

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Wed, 20 Sep 2006 16:08:28 GMT

So, for those of you who don’t know (most of you), I am now in a performance of Sugar (the musical version of Some Like It Hot), which means my life has become much more complicated, in a good way. Who I’m playing… well, that’s un poco complicado (I apparently have a minor degree in Mangled Spanish). Right now, though, I’m playing the band manager, which is kind of cool, because I get to spend the entire show hanging around a bunch of girls. Although mostly I get yelled at by the band’s leader… hmm. Anywho, it’s fun to hang with my old theatre friends, and I’ve met one or two lovely new ones, so, huzzah! and such.

Work on Pantheon continues to trek along, at a fairly good pace. The plan is to have a website up and in brilliant condition with lots of people reading it by this spring. And you will all read it and enjoy it. Just not yet.

Yesterday, the Thai government was overthrown (I’m too lazy to hunt down a link, but it’s the most important news story in the world right now, so find it yourself) by a military coup that is, ah, apparently not a military coup. At least according to its leaders. They have publicly stated that they do not want to run the Thai government, and that coups are a thing of the past. They simply want major political reform and the current Prime Minister ousted, claiming to still be loyal to the Thai King (constitutional monarchy and all that).

I’m not entirely sure which side I’m on for this one. If the military leaders are true to their word, I give them points for “new twist on an old routine” and for challenging government corruption. But (as of last night, anyway), they have yet to really explain what they want to replace the current regime with. I’m not a big fan of military interfering with politics (war veterans as presidents usually aside), and I’ve noticed that, historically speaking, most military dictatorships seem to lean to the right. Especially when it comes to human rights.

On the other hand, we have the current Prime Minister. Thaksin Shinawatra comes from one of the richest families in Thailand, and has been said to run Thailand “more like a corporate CEO than a Prime Minister.” That’s not an exact quote, by any means, but there you have it. I have to commend some of his policies- such as vastly improving impoverished rural areas of Thailand (and parts of Thailand are disgustingly poor, we’re talking third world level here) and working to grant universal health care to the country, despite major opposition. However, the man’s policy on drug use and related human rights is atrocious. In an intense 2-month anti-drug police fiasco sponsored by the Prime Minister, over two thousand people were reportedly killed in cases of supposed police brutality. So I’m kind of sitting out judgment on this thing until further notice. If anyone cares…

And finally, I want to laugh in the faces of all those pirates out there. Yesterday was International Talk Like A Pirate Day, and all day- despite being around theatre nerds and talking with my sister- I heard not one sentence in Pirate Speak. Hahaha!! No one cares about your lousy holiday, you scurvy-ridden bastards! Ninja Power!

Tell Me What You Don’t Like About Yourself.

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Tue, 05 Sep 2006 20:18:48 GMT

And now for TV News Time!, with your host, Spyder!

Dudes and dudettes! Do you know what today is? Today is September 5th, 2006. It’s Tuesday. And do you know what that means?

It means the season premiere of Nip/Tuck is tonight! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!! Every Tuesday through Christmas now I’ll get me my Nip/Tuck goodness. I managed to rewatch all of Season 3 in four days (it’s a very addicting show), to prep myself for the new stuff that starts tonight. Huzzah!

Now I just have to wait until October for new Veronica Mars (yay!) and then new Aqua Teen Hunger Force (squee!) and I will be all set to finish out this year with a bang! Venture Brothers continues to be great, and Metalocalypse has been more entertaining every time I watch it. Oh, and new Birdman coming too. Sweet.

Also! Since we’re sort of on an Adult Swim kick here, the ridiculously surreal and often times brilliant Perfect Hair Forever has been granted 10 more episodes, to appear on the adult swim website. Back in March or something, the show was cancelled officially after six episodes. I don’t know how Perfect Hair was cancelled after six episodes and yet the generally horrid Tom Goes to the Mayor is well into season two. Grrr!! But salvation has come for the imperiled show that brought us Uncle Grandfather. Hopefully these new episodes will be enough to bring, if not more episodes on TV, at least a DVD of the show. Here’s hoping.

And, lest you think all I ever watch is cartoons (as accurate as that statement may occasionally be), CBS has announced that it will soon be re-broadcasting the original Star Trek series, with new digital backgrounds, space ships, and other effects. I’m not sure how I feel about this. While the original series had amazingly crude effects, certainly, I’m a bit wary of the idea of Star Trek: Special Edition (Kirk Shot First?). Star Trek has been in a steady decline into an abysmal pit of unhappiness since Deep Space Nine ended (some would argue First Contact, but they just don’t like shows where continuity between episodes is actually extremely important), and I really just can’t believe that this will somehow rescue it. The creative team responsible for Star Trek has barely changed in 20 years. Is it possible that they’ve become so shortsighted and tunnel-visioned that they fail to understand what made the show interesting and popular in the first place? Can it be, that -*gasp!*- a change in guard is needed, and some new blood- willing to push the show’s self-created status quo out the window- might make a successful revival of the franchise possible?

Not that I would have any ideas how to bring Star Trek back and make it cool again. Of course not. *shifty glance*

We're Off To See The Lizard...

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Thu, 31 Aug 2006 16:30:03 GMT

“You have your fear, which may become reality. And you have Godzilla, which is reality.”

Lots of catching up to do! First and foremost, I discovered the most amazing thing ever!!! No, seriously! Don’t turn away!
Okay, everyone knows (and if you didn’t you’re about to) that my favorite cartoon character of all time is the one and only Mister Bugs Bunny. I mean, look at the guy: He’s formally recognized as a retired Master Sergeant of the US Marine Corp. He’s a film veteran of almost 70 years, who was freakin’ handed an Oscar he wasn’t supposed to win, just for being so awesome. He promoted positive images of bisexuality and transvestitism decades before it became publicly acceptable to do so. The man is worthy of unceasing praise.

Well, most people consider Bugs’ birthday to have been on July 27th, 1940. This coincides with the first classic Bugs Bunny cartoon’s release, A Wild Hare. It’s the first time Bugs Bunny appeared in the form we all know and love.

However! Bugs, like many other actors, has trimmed a few years off his official bio. Before he became an international superstar, Bugs played lesser antagonists in three earlier cartoons. The first of these, in which he played opposite then-Warner Brother’s mega-star Porky Pig, was in a short called Porky’s Hare Hunt which premiered on- get this- April 30th, 1938. Ahhhhh yeah! I share my birthday with Bugs Bunny! Fuck yes! Reality is my plaything! The universe truly is my friend!
So yes. I am made happy by this.

In other news, it is apparently Godzilla and Final Fantasy VI week at my apartment. And why is this, you ask? Well, because the last three nights I’ve ended up playing Final Fantasy VI while I watch a Godzilla movie. It’s not something I originally set out to do. It just kind of, you know, happened. So far this week I watched the most recent Godzilla: Final Wars (Japanese Version), Godzilla 2000 (American Version)(*sigh*), and last night the classic 1955 Godzilla Raids Again! (Japanese Version), which hasn’t been released in the US since 1959’s revamp of it as Gigantis the Fire Monster. Yes. They tried to pretend Godzilla was not actually Godzilla, the bastards! Luckily, thanks to the miracles of torrenting, I got to watch the original version with rather good subtitles. Also, it’s the second Godzilla film ever, and the first movie with two kaijus fight each other. So that was pretty cool. Huzzah!

Tonight? Who knows? Patrick’s downloaded a bunch of the old Godzilla movies though, so I’m sure to watch one of them. What’s all this leading to? Next weeks first ever non-theatrical release in the United States of the original Gojira, minus all the added American stuff with Raymond Burr, and with all the good anti-American/anti-nuclear stuff that they cut out here in the states. Yay!

So yes. I’ve been on this weird Pantheon/Star Trek/Godzilla kick for the last couple of weeks. It’s odd, but I’m enjoying it. I’ve been writing every day, which is awesome, and generally enjoying myself. Speaking of, I hope to have a sort of Pantheon-promo stuff website up in the next month or two. Yay! If anyone wants to preview a little of it (that’s one of those subtle hints that I doubt anyone will take me up on), just let me know. I could always use a fresh pair of eyes.

Excelsior!

"And Thus, Castro Did Fall"

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Fri, 04 Aug 2006 00:56:25 GMT

So Tuesday morning (August 1st) I was in Chi Town, just chillin', on my way to go see a bunch of rich dead people and extinct bird relatives, when I stop to make a brief pit stop and pay for parking. So I'm standing around for a couple minutes, (trying to convince the hot dog vendor that, no, I don't need a hot dog, I'm a vegetarian, and no, that does not mean I take care of sick turtles) when all of the sudden I notice the headline of the Tribune. "Castro To Step Down" (or something similar, it was two days ago).

I got to admit, I was bummed out. Fidel has always been one of my favorite Communist Dictators. I look at Fidel as sort of the crotchety old grandpa of a whole new generation of revolutionaries. Sure he's old and he complains a lot, but there's just something lovable about that moustache and cigar. He's like a big teddy bear, albeit one with a less than stellar human rights record. He's the iconic Latin American ruler: the military uniform, the beard (and what a great beard it truly is), the pack of smokes. So remember back when we did our John Paully Jr. Tribute? Well, today we're going to do a tribute to the Golden Age of Cuba, and the glorious leader who took a crappy little US resort territory and turned it into a tiny powerhouse that's been pissing off American Presidents ever since.

Fidel Alejandro Castro Ruz
(1926 - ? )(1959-2006)

Fidel was the son of a Spanish immigrant who had been reasonably profitable in the sugar cane industry. Though his father divorced his first wife and married Fidel's mother when Fidel was 15, he failed to formerly recognize him as his son until he was 17. It was at that point that Fidel switched from his mother's maiden name of Ruz and changed his middle name to Alejandro, after Alexander the Great. Clearly, Castro had no problem recognizing his own majesty.

In 1947, Fidel was taken under the wing of would-be Cuban President Eduardo Chibás. Chibás became his mentor, and their relationship was so close that Fidel was present when Chibás shot himself in the stomach during a campaign (long story). Fidel was there when he died at the hospital. In 1948 Fidel went to Bogotá, Colombia, to protest the United States' involvement with Cuba during the ninth Pan-American Union conference. When Columbian Populist leader Jorge Eliecer Gaitán was assassinated at the conference, violence broke out in the streets, and Fidel learned first hand the power of violent revolution. Fidel returned to Havana and opened a small law firm mostly representing the underprivileged in 1950.

(Young Fidel in action, 1947)

In 1952, General Fulgencio Batista overthrew the constitutionally elected Cuban government and took over himself. His usurpation was officially backed by the United States, effectively crushing any hopes that his reign would end quickly. Fidel challenged the constitutionality of Batista's overthrow, but no court would hear him. Fidel went underground, and with his group of followers attacked Batista's stronghold at Moncada. After the disastrous assault, Fidel was arrested and served a prison term of less than two years. After his release he went to Mexico and trained for several years, where he became friends with Che Guevara. Fidel and his men got some weapons while they visited the US, gaining support, and they crept back into Cuba in December of 1956.

(Guerilla Castro A-Go-Go)

On December 31st of 1958, after years of fighting, Fidel's forces captured the capitol city, and Batista fled. By February 16th, 1959, Fidel was sworn in as Prime Minister, beginning his 47-year reign. He's been pissing off Americans ever since.

In case you're wondering whom to blame for Fidel's negative image, I'm going to safely suggest Dwight Eisenhower. Two months after taking power, Fidel did a tour of the United States, in an attempt to build support for his government from the American public. However, Eisenhower was still miffed that Fidel had gotten Batista exiled, so he down right refused to meet with him. After Ike gave him the finger, Fidel decided to give it right back, and joined forces with CCCP leader Nikita Khrushchev. Eisenhower broke off diplomatic relations with Cuba in 1960 after Cuba agreed to buy oil from Russia, and the whole thing spiraled out of control. After months of playing "gotcha, gotcha back", Eisenhower broke off all ties with Cuba in 1961, saying that Fidel had "provoked him once too often."

(Dwight Eisenhower, early American nemesis of Fidel)

Fucking Americans.

And since we're speaking of them, Castro has survived everything Americans can throw at him, more than once misjudging the Cuban people's support of Fidel and their general disdain for American would be conquerors. Castro survived the Bay of Pigs, the missile Crisis, and continues to deal with the Trade Embargo to this day. Although in the early days of the revolution, Castro could give Stalin a run for his money for totalitarianism (which is why his relationship with Che Guevara fell apart), he has mellowed out significantly over the last thirty years. Where once he was a crazy revolutionary who cared about nothing save his nationalistic vision of Cuba, now Fidel Castro is generally seen as a renowned world leader trying to strengthen his tiny nation's ties to the rest of the world. Fidel was good friends Canadian Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau, and has grown more and more popular with the world at large since the end of the Cold War. Cuba is the only country to have embassies in all independent Caribbean countries, and Cuba has strong ties with China and most countries in Central and South America. Castro has spent a great deal of time improving his country's ties with Mexico and the European Union. He has advocated more AIDS research, and has sent much aid to Africa to help the situation there. On a visit to South Africa, Nelson Mandela (another Tangled Web salutee) greeted him warmly and gave him the highest civilian award a foreign can receive, the Order of Good Hope.

(Fidel and Nikita always had a very close relationship, much to America's dismay)

(Fidel and PM Trudeau remained good friends until the former Prime Minister's death in 2000)

(Cuba and South Africa remain allies today)

Fidel has no statue made in his honour, nor schools or cities named after him. He has gone to great lengths to keep a Cult of Personality from forming around him, unlike certain other world leaders (communist and capitalist alike).

(I swear, I didn't photoshop this)

To be perfectly honest, the only people who really seem to have a big problem with Fidel Castro are Americans. Something about him removing all of our puppet leaders there, or something. The American government has been obsessed with removing Castro since before Bay of Pigs, with spectacularly poor results. On October 20th, 2004, the ultimate insult to America came, when a small stage floor did what the CIA never could- break Fidel's knee. I mean, when a microphone wire step does more damage than 40 years of trying to overthrow him, it tells you something about the USA.

(Castro's infamous fall)

I may disagree with several of Castro's policies (*cough* Civil Liberties for Homosexuals! Fair treatment of supposed Enemies of State! *cough cough!*), but I can't help but admire his courageous and seemingly unending ability to stick it to the man (meaning the United States, of course). So as he's stepped down, I feel unashamed to admit that I'll miss the old bastard, and I'll never forget that time he stopped by to visit Brent and me during that month in Tokyo.

(okay, fine, just pretend its really Fidel, okay?)

Fidel Castro, you and your occasionally oppressive regime may have killed more people than Jeffery Dahmer, but at least you did it with a style all your own. So to celebrate you, my sister Kiri and I have decided to make the official announcement of our new company,
Communist Enterprises, and our opening line of clothing. (the website’s not very good yet) Check out our big seller, the
"I (Heart) Fidel" T-Shirt!

(If this doesn't work, just click the damn link)

The coffee mugs are coming, and we've got more products than just that (but not much more yet). So go forth and buy our stuff! All proceeds go to the Fidel Castro Humanitarian Organization (sort of) (in a "not really" kind of way). All in all, Fidel Castro gets a bad name in the US press, just because he doesn't like us. And to that affect, I'd like to honour him with this olive branch: Fidel Castro, The Tangled Web salutes you.

You’ll Either Love This One Or Hate It

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Mon, 17 Jul 2006 19:35:00 GMT

All of you have Carl Zimmer to blame for this one. Go and read everything he’s ever written ever. I’m in the process of doing just that. And I thought I already wrote this article months ago, and I was just going to do an update on it. However, I skimmed the archives and I can’t find it anywhere, which means I have to write the whole thing from scratch. *sigh*

Today I’m going to discuss parasites, and no, Brent, I don’t mean corporate CEOs (although…). Oxford considers a parasite “an organism which lives in or on another organism and benefits at the other’s expense”. That’s a pretty broad spectrum to look at, really. Anything could be considered a parasite with such loose standards, so lets tighten up what we’ll be talking about here.

So, let’s instead focus on my personal favorite parasite, a cute little protozoan called Toxoplasma gondii. Since the species is the only know form of its genus, we’ll drop the “gondii” to make life simpler. Toxoplasma can be found in all mammals and birds, and it’s quite possibly the single most successful protozoan parasite on the planet. And what makes it so successful? Well, it’s extremely durable, easily contaminable, and it spends its life cycle in two of the most successful and spread out mammals on the planet: rats and cats.

Cats eat the contaminated rats. Toxoplasma can only enter the sexual portion of its life within the muscle and brain tissue of the Felidae family, so rats make the perfect host body for the parasites. The immature parasites inside the rat grow and reproduce inside the cat, and the baby parasites are sent out into the world through the cat’s waste system. Once in the dirt, rats and other mammals pick up the newborn parasites, where the cycle begins anew.

Of course, not just rats and mice pick up the baby Toxoplasma. Virtually any mammal or bird that comes in contact with the cat’s feces can become contaminated, as ingesting the matter or the soil around it causes infection. The cysts formed by Toxoplasma are extraordinarily durable, and they can survive for up too a year without latching onto a host body. Not only that, but anything else that eats the an infected mouse or rat can catch it right there as well. All of this helps to contribute to the parasites overwhelming success rate. It’s estimated that in humans 3 BILLION people are infected with Toxoplasma, 50 million in the USA alone. In case you’re wondering, that’s 1/6 of the country’s population. Any one who’s spent a great deal of time around cats has a good chance of getting infected, which means that yours truly probably has it (I’m making a point to find out next time I have blood work done. I’m curious, is all).

All this though would make Toxoplasma a mere passing interest, but it gets much better. You see, what makes Toxoplasma so interesting to me is what it does to its host body. Lots of parasites have staggeringly brilliant abilities to survive and prosper. Whether it’s Plasmodium(which causes malaria)’s ability to completely bypass the body’s immune system and survive inside of a red blood cell, or Trichinella’s ability to rewrite the genetic structure of it’s host’s cells, many parasites do rather fantastic things.

Toxoplasma, however, is a much more subtle parasite, which has contributed greatly to it’s success. An infected rat looks and acts like a regular, healthy rat. This is to the parasite’s advantage: If the infection caused the rat to look diseased or abnormal, a cat wouldn’t want to eat it.

Despite the fact that cats have been eating rats and mice for ages, statistically speaking, there have to be a lot more mice than cats for the mice to still be around (The average for a stable environ is one predator animal to 250 prey animals). Since cats and mice have been predator and prey for so long, natural selection has brought about a very important instinct within mice that is a big contributing factor to a mouse’s survival. As soon as a mouse smells cat urine it flees away. This is a fairly basic but effective adaptation: Mice that run from the smell of a cat are far less likely to be eaten than mice that don’t.

The only thing Toxoplasma does to change the mouse is to turn off this adaptation. A Toxoplasma Positive mouse won’t run away from cat urine. In fact, some studies suggest that an infected subject may linger at the scent for an abnormal amount of time. In effect, Toxoplasma causes the mouse to be more likely to get itself killed. Crazy, no? The parasite causes suicidal tendencies in the mouse, to advance it’s own life cycle. And it does more than that, too. Recent studies have found that the parasite actually regulates its host’s immune system to prevent the body from attacking it before it takes root.

Did I mention that half the human race is infected with this stuff?

That’s where things get interesting. Humans have no natural aversion to the smell of a cat, obviously, so it doesn’t cause us to leap into a lion pen or anything. But due to its prominence (and also because parasitology is only recently getting the mainstream scientific attention that bacteriums and viruses have enjoyed for a century) studies are being done to examine the effects of Toxoplasma in humans. Toxoplasmosis (the disease caused by the protozoan) is latent in most people with the condition. Again, the fact that half the planet has this condition and odds are you’ve never heard of it before now should suggest that this is generally not a dangerous parasite. Cysts can form on muscle and brain tissue, but they aren’t particularly dangerous except in the case of pregnancy, where the infant may possibly become infected. Acute toxoplasmosis occurs rarely upon initial infection, generally only in immunodeficient people. Symptoms are generally flu-like, but brain and eye damage can occur.

But does Toxoplasma have an effect as a behavior modifier on humans? Studies aren’t completely conclusive yet. Statistically speaking, people with Toxoplasma are at least twice as likely to suffer a car accident than an uninfected person. Some studies have shown that infected women are more out going, and infected men more socially paranoid, though these studies are currently in question.

However, the most interesting and cryptic possibly comes from Toxoplasma’s connection with schizophrenia. Research into a possible correlation between the two has been going on since the fifties, but only recently has much attention been paid to it. Infection with toxoplasmosis has been associated with the damage of astrocytes, a class of neuron. So has schizophrenia. In the early 2000s, E. Fuller. Torrey of the Stanley Medical Research Institute began compiling all the reports of a correlation between the two, and se out to find some results of his own. He found that women with high levels of Toxoplasma antibodies in their blood (indicating a fairly large infection) were much more likely to have children that would develop schizophrenia than women who were clean. And people with schizophrenia are twice as likely to have a Toxoplasma infection than people without the condition. Interestingly, Torrey discovered that many drugs that are used to treat schizophrenia were effective at causing Toxoplasma cells to stop growing.

No one’s sure yet how Toxoplasma may cause the condition, or if, perhaps, having schizophrenia increases the likelihood of catching toxoplasmosis. Perhaps it’s some strange combination of the two. But research continues, and no matter what the results, it seems clear that Toxoplasma gondii is one of the most successful parasites on the planet.

Holy Bejezzus Its Been A While!

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Thu, 06 Jul 2006 03:49:39 GMT

Bah. I haven't updated in a while. Why? Because I'm in two shows at once! So, now to shamelessly pimp my own stuff (It's my website, damnit!).

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead opens tomorrow at 7 PM, and also plays on Friday (same time). That's it. Sad really, I really love the show. It's at Stroud in U-High, and it's FREE!!!! Although if you donate a dollar my sister will love you. Go see it! Free entertainment! Justin as Hamlet! Dead bodies! Existentialism! Yay!

THEN! The following Thursday opens Beauty and the Beast at Community Players. This one is not free (sorry), but it will be a lot of fun. Yay! The shows are Thursday thru Sunday, for three weekends in a row. Awesome. Thursday, Friday, and Saturday shows are at 7:30, Sunday at 2:30. Go here for more information. Justin as Lefou (the badguy's sidekick/bitch)! Giant and outrageous costumes! Justin being physically abused! Repeatedly! Huzzah!

So yes. You should all go to them if you see this post. It will most enjoyable.

Spyder is...

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Sat, 17 Jun 2006 19:43:44 GMT

From Googlism.com:

spyder is revived
spyder is a complete email
spyder is much larger than todd's
spyder is best driven with the top down
spyder is one of the best buys in paintball
spyder is set to
spyder is revived by tony smith / ap business writer
spyder is a complete email notification system
spyder is loaded with standard equipment
spyder is unique
spyder is not simply a convertible
spyder is a
spyder is the only system i've found that makes that happen
spyder is much larger than todd's o&qm 2000
spyder is the first race model in the game
spyder is a four
spyder is best driven with the top down if you're tall
spyder is the first usb 2
spyder is appealing
spyder is a front
spyder is more relaxed than the previous model
spyder is straightforward and thanks to the extensive use of these engines in all sorts of
spyder is a 2
spyder is an almost identical recreation of the legendary porsche rsk racing car
spyder is also an official sponsor to the us alpine and us disabled ski teams
spyder is an official supplier to the us alpine
spyder is a software program that operates on palm handheld computers
spyder is a software system that operates on personal digital assistants
spyder is a nail
spyder is specifically designed to address those departments not requiring full blown gis seats
spyder is the solution for this
spyder is jam
spyder is youth on wheels
spyder is the ultimate driving experience
spyder is a convertable
spyder is a capwell beau resin customized by jamie coughlin and then repainted by the talented jeanine hartrampf
spyder is capable of a top speed
spyder is and you are trying to get an even amount of paint over the whole shape
spyder is toyota's attempt to return to the lightweight
spyder is a fancy way of saying convertible
spyder is the world renowned former hacker/computer guy
spyder is one of those cars that makes a lot of sense as a replica
spyder is capable of firing a whole lot faster due to the decreased
spyder is a direct competitor for the popular mazda miata
spyder is a back
spyder is both fancy and functional
spyder is a handsome timepiece
spyder is all black with numerous features on it
spyder is
spyder is available for ftp
spyder is simple yet aerodynamically effective
spyder is a nice piece of equipment
spyder is a totally other car then the 3200 gt
spyder is different
spyder is replaceable
spyder is a synthesis of state
spyder is a car for people who really love to drive and want a vehicle optimized for that application
spyder is one of the best
spyder is a single seat ultralight type aircraft
spyder is very efficient
spyder is comes with allot of nice aftermarket parts like a low pressure chamber and a rear cocking bolt
spyder is first of new breed
spyder is a modern sports car with back
spyder is a valuable addition to any production environment
spyder is so good
spyder is built for the aggregate producer on the move
spyder is an entirely new maserati that blends the pure style of an italian sports convertible with the world?s most advanced technology
spyder is a self
spyder is recording for you
spyder is the profit seeking of their dealer body
spyder is built to order according to your specifications
spyder is a black and white female with a solid
spyder is the name left behind
spyder is dye precision
spyder is creative female force that spins and weaves the beautiful designs of life
spyder is available in two basic variants
spyder is based on prosaic corolla
spyder is ranked 3 and has played for 9h23m in 31 days real name
spyder is a powerful and comprehensive healthcare fraud abuse and waste detection solution from hnc
spyder is a professional tool designed to extract targeted e
spyder is completely reliable
spyder is made up of a web of freelance professionals skilled in every media discipline
spyder is running hood
spyder is an open
spyder is a couple inches longer than its predecessor and has a wheelbase of 100
spyder is larger than the rambunctious old model
spyder is quick and agile without an overdamped suspension or big horsepower numbers
spyder is set to launch in spring 2000
spyder is the gorgeous 3200gt with the roof chopped off
spyder is helping him fulfill his new jersey

So now you know who I am. Ha.

New Site!

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Sun, 11 Jun 2006 04:13:25 GMT

This is mostly for Bruce at the moment (because he begged), but I have a new site! It is strictly a comic book review website. I know, it sounds kind of lame (Read:EXTREMELY LAME). But I need to do something to remain sane at work. It's full of annoying issues right now, but I'll get them sorted out in the weeks ahead. So, here you go, Bruce (and anyone who has waaaaaay too much free time right now):

Comics Caught In The Web

Give me a few months. It'll be rocktastic.

Humbug

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Wed, 07 Jun 2006 05:02:57 GMT

Bah. I knew the world wasn't going to end. Sigh. Now I have to wait til 12/22/12...

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Sun, 04 Jun 2006 02:44:27 GMT

I approve of this message.

All I know is that someone's making mone off these scientist-guys and I want in!

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Fri, 26 May 2006 19:10:50 GMT

Just saw X-Men 3 last night. Meh. Too much action, not enough characterization. As in, none at all really, save Jean going crazy. And that happens all at once, off camera. So it’s not like it really counts.

Apparently, Tom DeLay just doesn’t get the joke. You have no idea how much this amuses me. Teehee.

Also, I’m currently looking to tmploy some mad scientists. Does anyone know any? It’s for a…. school science project? Yes?

"An Open Letter to George Walker Bush" or "Spyder Signs His Own Death Warrant"

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Thu, 11 May 2006 23:11:03 GMT

You know what I hate? What I fucking hate beyond all conceivable belief, with a rage that could, if released, extinguish suns?

The cock sucking Bush Administration.

I could deal with they’re idiotic objectives. I handled their blatant homophobia. I even sort of got over their extremely long list of human rights violations (although I still cling to it whenever I get politically riled up, like, say, right now.) But this! This shit! This is it. I have officially been put over the edge. I should just fucking secede right now, because this shit about monitoring virtually ALL telephone lines in the US has officially ended any shred of patience I may still have had for this administration!

You hear that George Bush! No more tolerance for you and your cronies! No more keeping quiet when my racist grandfather starts whining about “those damn democrats”! No more tolerance of right-wing Christians verbally assaulting anyone they consider “non-religious”! No more “acceptance” of any of your bullshit you’ve brainwashed half the zombies in this country into believing! From now on, you and your entire “Christian Right” are officially off my “Annoy Me Greatly List” and are now on my “Seek Out and Destroy Everything They Hold Dear” list! And guess fucking what? No one has EVER fucking made that list before! It’s OVER! I fucking hate you, you racist Nazi, and your fucking Nazi totalitarian politics! I hope vultures gnaw out your eyes while you have sulfuric acid injected into your scrotum! You FUCKING bastard, I want you to go feet first into a woodchipper, so that you feel EVERY FUCKING MOMENT OF IT.

DIE ALREADY!

…Ahem Thanks guys. I feel a little better now.

Reading Comics at Work is Awesome!

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Wed, 10 May 2006 22:39:57 GMT

Man, I wanted to put something clever and enlightening on today. But the more I typed it and thought about it, the more I realized I was just sitting around whining. And man, I hate it when I start going all emo kid on people. So I promptly deleted a three page rant on sexual conformity, identity, and repression issues and instead, you guys get this.

Hello.

(As a side note, I’m still going to try to write something on the topic, it may just take a little time is all. Because annoying emo kid rants are stupid, and I wish to avoid them).

Today is the first day of 52! Ok, yeah sure, the first issue is a bit of a drag, but it’s all setup, after all. And the page with the Question! You know, the one I posted a couple months back? Freakin’ awesome! Still! Now that it’s in the actual comic! … Okay, so that was, like, his only appearance all issue, but he’s a main character, and a shadow-clinging-type as well, so he’s probably going to stay in the background for a couple weeks. Still. I mean, we’ve got 1 more issues. Plenty of time for him to kick ass in. Its early, and I’m going to enjoy this series.

Umm… yes. That’s all I got, I guess.

Naysayers Be Damned!!! Also, I Do Not Condone Baby Consumption

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Fri, 05 May 2006 20:57:11 GMT

All right, just a reminder to everyone (not that anyone’s forgotten), Saturday, at 8:00 PM, at my apartment, is the official The Amazing Justin Palm and Astonishing Patrick Wade 20th Birthday Extravaganza! Now, I know there are totally no naysayers to this- I mean, why would anyone naysay something this cool?- but just in case there are naysayers lurking in the background somewhere, I have two words for you. Two very powerful words: Batman. Cake.

Oh, sweet Delia, yes. Say it with me now: “Batman Cake.” Batman Cake! Motherfucking Batman on a Motherfucking Batman Cake! Yeeeesssssssss!!! So good! Plus! It comes with a toy Batmobile! How cool is that? I’ll tell you how cool: Super Awesome Cool. Cool to the nth power. 50,000 god damn Mega-Fonzies. Which is hella cool.

So, everyone should go. All are welcome! Everyone! Except the police. Coppers have a tendency to ruin my fun.

Also, before I go, I’d like to point out that I, also, do not eat babies.

…

Though they are tasty and delicious when properly served.

She Blinded Me- With Science!

redspyderrising@gmail.com — Wed, 03 May 2006 19:17:58 GMT

Henrietta Lacks was born as Gladys Pleasant on August 18th, 1920 in Roanoke, Virginia (this would be the modern Roanoke, not the Croatoan one which I hope to write a column on eventually). In 1924, Henrietta’s mother Eliza died giving birth to her tenth child. She was 38 years old. In 1929, Henrietta’s 48-year-old father John married a 13-year-old girl named Lillian. I can only imagine what the family dynamics in that household were, considering John’s oldest son was 20 at the time. In 1943 Henrietta moved to Maryland where she married David Lacks. They had 5 children.

On February 1st, 1951, Henrietta was admitted to John Hopkins Hospital, where she was diagnosed with cervical cancer. She died on October 4th of the same year, age 31. This would have been where her life’s story ended, had a scientist George Otto Gey not cultivated a portion of her cervix. Mrs. Lacks cancer tissue would prove to be a marvel to modern science

Dubbed “HeLa”, the cells were originally used to test cancer treatments. It was discovered that HeLa was the perfect test subject. HeLa are single cellular units. HeLa do not age, making them theoretically immortal. HeLa propagate indefinitely, provided a suitable environment is maintained. HeLa has spent the last 50 years continuously evolving, and now several different strains exist, all originally coming from the first cultured sample from Mrs. Lacks.

HeLa reproduces extremely rapidly, faster than most other cancers. The cells release the enzyme telomerase during cell division. This enzyme adds DNA sequence repeats to the telomere regions of chromosomes. What that means? Telomeres work as chromosomal buffers during cellular reproduction. Without them, genetic information is lost, resulting in cellular corrosion. In most cases of human cells, however, every time a cell divides the telomere section of that cell’s chromosomes shrink a little bit, which is a major cause for the aging process. Several premature aging syndromes are thought to be caused by stunted telomeres, including Werner Syndrome. So, because HeLa are constantly dividing and constantly generating telomerase, they never age.

These immortal, constantly duplicating cells are brilliant for use in cancer treatments, but they were instrumental for Jonas Salk and his team in the development of the first polio vaccine. That’s right, not only are HeLa immortal and useful to cancer research, but they help cure polio.

And there’s more! Ok, it’s not official, but in 1991 Leigh Van Valen, the man who first proposed one of my favorite evolutionary biology concepts (the Red Queen hypothesis, for those keeping score at home), suggested HeLa be reclassified as a new species of cell, Helacyton gartleri, which would not only make it the first classified species to evolve from humans, but also a downgrade from a complex multicellular structure to a single celled life form. No one’s really taken him up on it though, so for now it remains classified as a chimera form of human papillomavirus. In case you’re wondering, it’s thought that 80% of sexually active adults have some form or another of HPV, and it’s usually harmless. But HeLa is clearly way more awesome than a boring virus that everyone on the planet has, so I think connecting it with that should be downplayed. But that’s just my personal opinion.

Anyway! HeLa is an extremely important medical find, and we all have Henrietta Lacks to thank for it. So here’s a Tangled Web salute to you and your miracle cancer, Mrs. Lacks. You’ve helped modern oncology and biology in general. Plus you may have spawned an immortal line of single celled human descendants. HeLa rules!